Field Report: Sinn

Oh, that was just a teaser. :-)

But yes it's coming. I can't think of any reason he would continue to douche me when I haven't even mentioned him in weeks except that we hooked up in Vegas.

It's a story that's time has come to be told.

More very soon ...

Law of Attraction: Which are more powerful for transforming my life? Thoughts or feelings

I'm feeling amused this morning by the comments I have received over on the 21 Convention website about my speech (you can see the page by going here). I feel especially surprised and entertained by the fact that "I would definitely bang her" has actually become a compliment that I enjoy. Clearly I have been hanging out in this community for too long!

Anyway, I've been getting a lot of great feedback about the speech, which feels great. For those who are interested in my coaching, I encourage you to watch the speech because it gives a very solid introduction to my coaching philosophy.

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Daria and I had some pretty intense conversations over the PUA Summit weekend about Rori Raye's blog. I really enjoyed hearing Daria's perspective because it is different from my own. For purposes of this article, please note that these are my interpretations of Rori's work (which I admire very much and often recommend to women). One thing I learned from my conversation with Daria is that we had very different interpretations of the same teachings on Rori's blog, so I don't want to be putting words in anyone's mouth here. These are my impressions, thoughts, and feelings, not to be attributed to anyone else.

One of my frustrations on the blog is my sense that there is not a lot of room for anything but "feeling messages." (For the uninitiated, a feeling message is a way of communicating that involves expressing one's feelings without making it "about" the other person or people involved in the situation.) I love feeling messages, and I do find them transformative for relationships when used on a regular basis.

My coaching work, however, involves transforming both thoughts and feelings. Although feelings are incredibly important, so are thoughts. When thoughts are left out of the picture, I believe we are losing a very important tool for transforming our lives.

Rori has been posting some Notes from the Universe from Tom Dooley (who was in the movie The Secret, which was about the Law of Attraction). Now, Tom Dooley recognizes the importance of thoughts because one of his mottos is "Thoughts become things."

A Course in Miracles also takes about the importance of thoughts. "There are no idle thoughts. All thinking becomes form at some level."

Now let's take the Sirens on Rori's blog. Let's say there is a Siren on there who keeps having the same frustrating experience with men over and over again (whether it's a man cheating on her or not being chivalrous on dates, etc.).

There are many different ways we can approach this problem. Feeling messages are one really powerful way, and that's what I hear Rori teaching most of the time. The woman in the situation can start expressing herself to men in a way that men are likely to be able to hear her ("I don't want to drive across town to see you. I feel flustered when a man asks me to do that."). And so forth.

When I coach women in these situations, I'm definitely going to recommend Rori's work, non-violent communication, and feeling messages.

But I'm also going to do something else. I'm going to help the woman change her beliefs about herself and about men. This is working on the level of thoughts in addition to feelings.

Let's say the problem is that she keeps meeting men who are not chivalrous. In this situation, we'll have both feelings and thoughts.

Feelings might be "I feel frustrated, inadequate, powerless to inspire men to give to me." Etc.

But lurking behind those feelings are thoughts. Thoughts might include: "I don't deserve to receive from men, men are stingy and selfish, I don't have what it takes to inspire men." Etc.

And lurking below those thoughts are usually memories that gave rise to beliefs. "Dad wasn't chivalrous with Mom. My parents taught me that I had to work hard for any money I received. My parents taught that there are no differences between men and women, we are supposed to be equal and the same." Etc.

During an Emotional Freedom Technique (tapping) session, we are going to be working with ALL of those levels. Yes, we are going to release the negative feelings, because feelings of frustration and impatience and anger are often blocking us from creating what we want in our life.

But we are also going to let go of the negative beliefs about self and others, and replace them with positive affirmations. (Affirmations are FAR more effective when implanted in an EFT/tapping session than they are just using them the regular way.)

For example, we might say:

"Even though I feel so frustrated
because men have never been chivalrous with me,
my dad wasn't chivalrous with my mom,
and I'm not sure I deserve chivalry from men,
I feel like I'm taking something away from them,
I love and accept myself completely."

"Even though I don't want to let go of this belief.
This is my comfort zone, I don't feel safe letting this go,
I choose to let this belief go anyway,
I choose to be open to the possibility that men start being chivalrous with me
right now."

And so forth.

By working on the levels of feelings, thoughts, AND memories, simultaneously, we are able to create fast and dramatic transformation in your love life. I have seen so many miracles after sessions like this. In the above example, after a powerful EFT session, men will start showing up differently in the woman's life. They will start being chivalrous without her even having to ask. It will just happen.

Then she can feel relaxed receiving from men.

This is how we change people's lives, one belief at a time.

Love,
Erika
(my coaching page is here)

Change Yourself, and Everyone Else Will Change ...

As I was driving home tonight from the airport, feeling very happy and empowered after a really fun weekend at the PUA World Summit, Michael Jackson's song The Man in the Mirror came on the radio. "If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and make the change."

It was a good synchronicity, because I had just received a testimonial from a guy I did a private Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT or tapping) session with earlier in the day.

JD came to me with a very long list of frustrations, most notably that he tends to get angry a lot and pick fights with his girlfriend. As often happens with EFT sessions, he arrived at the hotel today for his session having just experienced a mini-crisis. He and his girlfriend had another fight this morning, she had shut him out, and he was worried that the relationship might be over.

We very quickly found some core beliefs and patterns for JD. We explored some memories about things his parents had done, and about his feelings of being inadequate compared to his brother. We explored patterns of not feeling comfortable being fully authentic.

I used EFT to go back and forth between present moment and past memories, so that we would clear the negative emotions and patterns from both out of his subconscious mind simultaneously. I wanted him to become conscious of how the old patterns with his family continue to affect his present day relationships.

He cried, he laughed, he had some powerful realizations. We implanted some powerful affirmations about stepping into his power and speaking his truth. By the time we were finished at the end of an hour and a half, his emotional state felt so much lighter.

Well, when my plane landed at the airport this evening, I had received this email from JD:

Thank you for the EFT session. I was feeling nervous, anxious and had my doubts because there are lots of products and "guarantees" going out on the community. Yet I have discovered [Emotional Freedom Technique] goes way deeper than anything else. I never thought I would feel intense roller coaster emotions in such a short period of time. Today I received a mind-shift and a new perspective of a new reality. Amazing. I look forward to doing the homework assignments and doing EFT on myself.

I know this might sound cheesy. Yet Miracles do happen and one's Reality and people that he/she surrounds themselves with conform. The girl I had a argument with earlier that day. She texted me multiple times apologizing and worried if I arrived at the appointment on time and if I ate breakfast and even called me with a Happy relaxed tone of voice! And noticed others around me reacting to me in a positive light.

I just kept thinking. Is there something that I have that is hypnotizing everyone around me to be very helpful and nice to me? lol

Will do another EFT session as a follow-up on my goal to be 100% Present and Authentic Man. Thank you!

-JD

Congratulations, JD, that is awesome. What happened here to create such a profound change in JD's life so quickly? It's really very simple ... we raised JD's vibration by tapping out a large amount of negative emotion and belief during our session ... as a result, his vibe shifted, and already the people around him are changing.

Miracles are commonplace with EFT. It is quite common after a powerful EFT session that we will hear from someone with whom we were having a conflict and be able to make amends, or that a previously stressful situation will suddenly shift to a peaceful one. It happens all the time. I love doing this work because it is SO satisfying to hear the success stories from my clients. It makes me light up inside to hear JD's words :-)

Change yourself using EFT, and everyone else in your life will change. When we try to change others, we give away our power. But when we change ourselves in a powerful way, others have no choice but to change with us. Enemies become friends. Stingy people become generous. "Difficult" people become calm and peaceful.

That is how powerful we really are.

Thank you, JD. It was a pleasure and an inspiration working with you, and I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Updates and South American Tour?

1. The PUA World Summit

Daria and I are having SUCH a good time at the PUA World Summit! It's a really high energy event, with really high energy speakers. We went out with Hypnotica last night. I did some Emotional Freedom Technique with a guy in field at a club. Hypnotica did his Six Layers of Logic healing with Daria in our hotel room. I gave Reiki to Hypnotica and Daria with all three of us lying on my bed, and it was all in all a *very* sex evening.

To top it off, I was thrilled because I only had about five minutes to speak on the Panel on Saturday, but that was great for me because it compelled me to condense my coaching "message" down to a very short summary. And a huge number of guys have approached me afterwards who are interested in EFT coaching, so the message must have resonated.

This is my message: For the most part, I'm not going to teach you how to approach, kiss close, attract women (or men, if you are a woman), and so forth. There are already many wonderful coaches in the industry teaching these techniques. My coaching is for the man or woman who KNOWS what to do but is having trouble executing or succeeding. The person who is running into psychological sticking points such as freezing up, dampening him or herself down, hesitating, beating him or herself up, etc. My EFT work removes the limiting beliefs that are stopping you from living the love life are your dreams, installs a super positive self image, and makes it possible for you to attract amazing men or women into your life effortlessly and naturally, in connections and relationships (be it for one night or a lifetime) that feel good to everyone involved.

2. Update on Coaching Discounts for Members of My Newsletter List

Because I've been approached by so many guys at the Summit, and I'd like them to be able to take advantage of the coaching discounts that I sent out to members of my newsletter list earlier this week, I am extending the discounts for three more days, until Wednesday September 30 at 11:59 pm Pacific time. To be eligible, the only thing you need to do is sign up (read more here). Please email me at erika.awakening@gmail.com with any questions.

3. Joint Workshop with Hristiyan Atanasov

You all may remember Hristiyan from my earlier posts about his amazing workshop back in May. He and I are now considering whether to offer a joint workshop that would combine the immense power of his coaching for creating deep connections between men and women, and my Emotional Freedom Technique coaching. This would be a truly transformational event!! I envision it being a coed male/female workshop, and the first I know if its kind.

I'll be posting more developments here, but if you're interested in doing a workshop with Hristiyan and me, please email me at erika.awakening@gmail.com.

4. South American Tour with Francis Adams ...

Finally, some of you may remember me talking about Francis Adams in my post after the 21 Convention. He is a dynamic and magnetic teacher of what I would call "normal cool guy" game and social circle game. And he walks his talk. This is a guy who knows how to create super fast authentic and sexual connections with women.

Fran and I had so much together at the Convention, that we are now talking about doing some coaching together. We both like to travel. In fact, I recently received a fortune cookie that said this: "You will set foot on the soil of many foreign countries." Feels true -- I fully intend to take my coaching all over the world in the not-too-distant future.

We both would love to go to South America, and the only catch is that we would need to do enough coaching down there to pay for our trip. So we would love for anyone who is in South America and would be interested in super powerful joint coaching from Fran and me to please email me with erika.awakening@gmail.com. We are also open to other equally fun locations. The time period would most likely be the few weeks right after Christmas. We would love to hear from you if this is something you'd be interested in!

(Btw, you can see the video of my 21 Convention speech by going here. Fran's is also up on the official 21 Convention site, so you can get a feel for his work also.)

Newsletter Update

Hey everyone,

I just sent out my very first newsletter, with a members-only significant coaching discount, as promised in yesterday's post.

This is a great time to make sure that if you intended to sign up for the newsletter, you are actually on the list. I don't want you to miss out on the content or the discounts!

If you did not receive an email in your inbox, please check your bulk folder and add erika.awakening@gmail.com to your safe list. If you did not receive an email in your inbox or bulk folder, please sign up for the list here.

If you still do not receive anything, please please email me at erika.awakening@gmail.com, and I will help you get signed up.

Thank you ... and let the fun begin :-)

xoxo,
Erika

Erika's Newsletter Sign Ups

Hey everyone,

I have a lot going on at the moment, so this will be super short, and we'll be back to more in-depth content as quickly as possible.

First, I'm excited because I'm going to meet Magnus PUA tonight. For those who don't know, he is also an Emotional Freedom Technique practitioner like me. I shall report back. He seems really fun, so I'm looking forward to it.

Second, I've received emails from some people who tried to sign up for my newsletter and never received the email confirming their subscription. If you didn't receive that email and click on the link inside it, you are not yet subscribed and will miss out on the wonderful content, exclusive discounts on coaching and products, and advance notification of news such as my upcoming e-book.

So please, make sure to sign up here and then if you don't receive an email that says "Confirm your subscription," please go to your bulk mail folder and check for it there.

I want to make sure you are included in all the members-only news and offers.

There's lots more to report, and we have the PUA World Summit this weekend, but right now I'm out of time.

Why I sometimes say shocking things: the value of provocation for creating deep and lasting change

This is a topic that came up recently on Rori's blog. I wanted to share more about my intentions when I sometimes say shocking things (such as "I don't like condoms").

Most people are familiar with the concept of ego (meaning, for example, the way that A Course in Miracles or Eckhart Tolle talk about it). The ego is the part of us that wants to be separate from others. It creates all of the dysfunction in our lives, including addictive patterns, conflict, separation, disease, and so forth.

We also have a Higher Self, which is tapped in to the collective consciousness through intuition, which trusts, which sees everyone as friends, which knows how to achieve win/win outcomes in every situation, and so forth.

Here's the problem for most people: the ego runs on autopilot. It thrives on routine. No matter how much people try to stop smoking, or overeating, or biting their nails, or attracting the same old "story" or conflict into their lives, they feel powerless to change. The ego holds these old patterns in place to preserve itself, and these patterns can be very, very stubborn. No matter how much we consciously resolve to change, the unconscious routine-driven ego mind takes over and sabotages our efforts.

For years now, I have been searching for and experimenting with ways to get myself and others out of these old destructive patterns. Emotional Freedom Technique, which I talk about a lot on here, is the most powerful method I have found.

But it's not the only one. Because the ego thrives on routine, another very powerful way to disrupt it is through shock or provocation. And I'll tell you why. Here goes the ego, running the same old story it has always played out in your life (for example, the "poor me" victim story) ... and then, wham! all of a sudden I do or say something completely different than I've ever done before.

What happens then? Immediately, the unconscious story becomes conscious. The story that was playing out has been disrupted, and the ego cannot go merrily along on its way. It has to sit up and take notice. I call this Ego Interruptus. These are powerful moments. These are moments where deep and lasting change becomes possible.

Let me give some examples:

Say, for example, that a woman has been playing the "doormat" role in her relationships, doing all the work, paying for things, seeking his approval, etc. Then suddenly one day she simply stops whatever she has been doing and says "no." Perhaps she disappears for a day and takes herself to the spa instead of cooking and cleaning. You better believe he's going to notice. All of a sudden, both she and the guy are going to be awake instead off unconsciously playing out the same old story. Now there is space for renegotiation of the relationship.

Or take the "I don't like condoms" example. Lots of people are using them on autopilot, making all kinds of assumptions about why they are using them. If we ask the provocative question, "what fears am I covering up by using these?" then we open up space for a renegotiation of our relationship with condoms and sex.

I ask provocative questions with my clients all the time (don't worry ... I'm also gentle and loving! ;-). I don't go along with the "story" that "I want to change but I can't." I ask them, "what are the reasons why you are refusing to change?" Wow does that open up space. "What are the reasons why you refuse to succeed?" "What are the reasons why you don't want the intimacy you claim to want?" Ah yes, the ego cannot continue on autopilot when we ask provocative questions like this, because awareness has been brought into the situation. With awareness comes presence. With presence comes healing.

It is in part my willingness to provoke that empowers me to help my clients achieve dramatic and lasting change even when they tried everything else, and nothing worked. So whether you're trying to lose weight, become more confident, have better relationships, or break through a particularly stubborn "sticking point," my methods will work to get you unstuck.

By the way, I will be offering a significant discount on my normal coaching rates this week, but it will only be available to subscribers of my newsletter. If you've been wanting to sign up for sessions but are currently facing financial challenges (which, btw, we can alleviate with EFT), then this is your chance! Please click this link to subscribe now.

Practicing Presence

Burning Man Guy has been over most of the day. We did some tapping for both of us. Afterwards, I felt all soft and pliable. Ever since Burning Man, my body feels different. A lot of the muscle tension that was stored all over, in my hands, feet, calves, thighs, well, everywhere, is gone now. It was stored-up trauma, which most people are carrying around without even realizing it, and it's not there anymore.

He fell asleep, and I wanted to get this down in words while the moment is fresh in my mind. We've been practicing just lying here, cuddling, fully clothed, and exchanging tantric energy. It feels amazing, and it brings up all the little anxieties that many people gloss over by rushing into sex. Then we get present with the anxiety, and it shifts, and the tantric glow returns.

It's a lovely way to get intimate with someone.

I wanted to mention it because I see so many people in the community rushing into sex. With a mentality of "I've got to get this nailed down or it might not be there for me anymore." As BMG puts it, rushing to dessert without sampling the appetizers, soup, and salad that are to be found on the way to the destination.

It's okay to slow down. It's okay to become present with all the crazy feelings that we all have stored inside of us, and to share them.

That's all for now. :-)

Thoughts on being banned from RSD Nation

I was banned from posting on RSD Nation last weekend.

I'm noticing a lot of mixed feelings about this and wanted to share them here, with the intention of (hopefully) getting people in the seduction community talking.

My first response, and it's still with me, was some sadness. Initially sadness that no one talked to me before banning me, they just did it.

Perhaps they viewed it as a business decision, but from my perspective it's more than that. This is a community that I've been participating in for a year now, and it felt like a community to me. It's vibrant. I enjoy it. So to be unceremoniously banned without anyone bothering to talk with me about it first feels ... sad.

Especially because I have such high regard for the guys who work for RSD. I have recommended their company to many men who I've met when I go out and have supported them on my blog. I had been told many negative things about RSD (the whole "cult" story etc.) but I have always defended them. At least they let people post URLs on their forum, unlike the other major player in the seduction community forum market. I felt encouraged when they started sending speakers to community events (Tyler at Complete Toolbox and Nathan at 21 Convention). I felt a new openness in the company.

(Later I learned that a friend of mine did try to call me to let me know before deactivating my account, but I didn't get a message ... and I still feel sad about not having the opportunity to talk with them first.)

My sadness was mixed in with other feelings. In some ways, being banned from RSD is a rite of passage. But ... still a feeling of "ouch" and something more ...

I realized my sadness goes deeper than just that feeling of not being treated like a person rather than an anonymous entity.

And it extends beyond RSD to the community at large. I feel sad about the idea of any of us treating each other as "competitors." I don't view myself as a competitor in any sense. I offer coaching based in Emotional Freedom Technique. It's not something they offer. I'm a complement to what is already offered, not a replacement. I'm also bringing people in to the community who are interested in EFT and some of the other things I write about, who otherwise would never have found the community.

Beyond that, though, there are so many ways in which we can all help each other instead of competing. With affiliate arrangements, for example, so-called "competitors" suddenly become friends.

There are ways to make this win/win, guys. I am still convinced that every one of us in the community has a slightly different target audience, and that the potential audience for these teachings is ENORMOUS. Far beyond what has yet been tapped. If I consider all the unhappy men and women in the world, and all the unhappy relationships that could be enlivened and healed with these teachings, what I see is a market that is many, many, many times larger than what we currently have.

You can be sure that I'll be doing some tapping on these issues over the weeks to come, to see what miracles I can manifest into my life. But in the meantime, I would welcome anyone in the community to talk openly about this phenomenon of closing our doors to each other ... because I don't think it helps anyone.

"If I defend, I am attacked" ... is Monogamy a "defense"?

I'm going to write Part 2 of the "Why I don't like condoms" article.

And I still need to write Part 3 of the Burning Man story.

In the meantime, I'm increasingly pondering whether monogamy -- and possibly even commitment -- is a defense. Not unlike condoms.

This is coming up because Burning Man Guy and I have been seeing a lot of each other, and we're considering whether we're now in an "open" relationship.

The conversations have been fairly humorous.

Him: I'm too wild to be tamed, even by a priestess. Although you're not doing too bad.

Me: Lol I'm not trying to tame you.

Him: I know. You get me purring tho.

Me: I have enough of my own feelings much less attempt to tame yours.

And later he said: You're up for an open relationship?

Me: Yes aren't we both trying to work out this polyamory thing?

Later I said: I don't see how we could have any kind of non-open relationship cuz I don't want to put any energy into worrying if you'd be with other women.

We'll see what happens, but what I'm noticing is how much the idea of monogamy feels like a defense to me. It feels like it creates fear where none was there before.

What, exactly, would I be "protecting" by putting those kinds of rules on another human being? And would I really be protecting anything, or would I just be setting myself up for stress and disappointment?

If Burning Man Guy is utterly free to have sex with whomever he wants, then I don't need to police what he's doing. I don't need to feel that my trust was betrayed if he connects with someone else. It becomes impossible for him to "cheat." I haven't created a line, so there's no line to cross.

"If I defend, I am attacked."

It's worth pondering.

Cause and Effect: Clarifying Misunderstandings on this Blog

I realized tonight the fundamental source of some confusion on this blog.

Many of my readers are still operating under the physical laws of cause and effect.

This blog is operating under the idea that the mind is cause and everything we see is effect.

Under the physical laws, miracles are impossible.

When we realize that our minds are creating everything we see, miracles become commonplace. Sickness and death and violence become impossible, because we realize that we created them, and therefore we can also abolish them. And why wouldn't we, since we are God incarnate?

This is why Emotional Freedom Technique works. It changes the subconscious mind and thereby creates miracles in the world we see.

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Speaking of miracles, here is the introduction from A Course in Miracles:

This is A Course In Miracles. It is a required course. Only the time you take it is voluntary. Free will does not mean that you can establish the curriculum. It means only that you can elect what you want to take at a given time. The course does not aim at teaching the meaning of love, for that is beyond what can be taught. It does aim, however, at removing the blocks to the awareness of love's presence, which is your natural inheritance. The opposite of love is fear, but what is all-encompassing can have no opposite. This course can therefore be summed up very simply in this way:

Nothing real can be threatened.
Nothing unreal exists.
Herein lies the peace of God.

Will Getting Laid Make You Happy ... or Is There Something More?

I feel really touched by the email I received tonight from the one-on-one client I worked with this past weekend. If you all knew who he is, you'd be shocked that we ended up working together ;-)

He came to me because his life had bottomed out. He was in a state of despair and anxiety, with thoughts of vengeance and anger. What he desperately needed was empathy. The problem is that very few people in this world know how to give empathy. They give a lot of advice and judgment and criticism, but they don't know how to listen with presence and allow negative energies to be vaporized.

For the first few hours that we worked together, it took every bit of my own strength to maintain a space of Presence with him. He was dissociating in a big way (meaning, he was avoiding his feelings by going off on tangents, talking a mile a minute, etc.). I used Emotional Freedom Technique to ground him and to interrupt the pattern of avoiding his feelings.

Once he was grounded, our real work began. Of course his anxiety appeared to be focused in the present moment, but it never really is. We cleared out a ton of childhood memories involving shame and guilt.

As each hour rolled on, he changed. He became more grounded and present, he started smiling and laughing, his words started slowing down, there were pauses when I asked questions. He started to notice me (this is one of the first things that happens when we become truly present -- we start to notice other people in a way that we were blinded to before). He started being more open and honest and vulnerable.

I'm not going to tell you that all his problems were solved in one weekend, but we made a substantial start. As for how he feels about it, I'll let him tell you in his own words. This is his unedited email:


I got into pickup to meet women, get good with them, and fuck them. Yeah, I got good. I am good at it. But it helped fuck me up too. You do learn a lot about yourself doing this stuff, but its not always stuff you wanna learn.

There is so much emphasis on getting in girls pants going on, and getting women, but no one talks about what you should do once you have it. Its my experience that you get sort of disappointed. Disappointed that the media is largely marketing a culture rooted in selling you things, not making you happy. Im not going to rant on that now, but I will just say that cool cars, money, tons of ass.... these things will make you happy - for a little while. Not long enough though.

I had an ongoing personal crisis in my life, and it reached a climax. I touched the bottom. I talked to everyone for help and looked for help in places I never looked before. Many people listened, yet didnt really help. And a few other people, who I gave my all into helped me in more ways than I expected. Erika is one of those people.... probably the biggest one.

I wasnt doing EFT for meeting girls. I was doing it with her for meeting myself. And what to do with myself. I think being a more radiant and honest and positive person gets more girls as a biproduct of those things. Like if you are only being "honest" (/direct) to get ass... then are you being honest?

One of the reasons I thought Erika might be able to help me is because I find a lot of the things and ideas she holds on her blog to be disputable. Thats why I asked her for help.

Afterwards I told Erika that she could have charged me wayyyy more for what I got out of it. What she does with EFT will very much help you with women, but helping yourself with being a person comes first.

Why People are Dishonest in Relationships

This weekend I'm doing an intensive coaching one-on-one with a guy, and I also did some Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) with Burning Man Guy last night.

A theme is coming up that I wanted to share with all of you.

If people are getting angry with you in any area of your life, look within. It means you have uncleared guilt. If you clear the guilt with EFT, they will no longer be angry.

What is guilt? It is an incongruity. Dishonesty in any form will create guilt.

An example is if we promise someone something, expressly or implied, and don't follow through on that promise. We are likely to feel guilt, and the person affected will likely feel anger.

One of the fastest ways to clear this kind of guilt/anger situation is to have a mediated conversation. A good non-violent mediator will usually be able to bring the two people back to a space of understanding and compassion.

It helps to understand the roots of dishonesty. When people are not fully honest in relationships, it is because there is a lack of self-acceptance.

Burning Man Guy is a good example. He promised monogamy to someone and did not deliver. You better believe that created an "ouch" for the other person in the relationship. Why was he dishonest? Because he lacks full self-acceptance. Part of him thinks that the only way women will be in relationships with him is if he promises monogamy. Part of him sees himself as a sexual healer and "wild animal" who is sexual with many women. That unresolved incongruity creates a lack of self-acceptance, guilt, and the temptation toward dishonesty. The problem is that dishonesty may get us what we think we want short term, but long term it wreaks havoc with our relationships. Far better to get in touch with the inner conflicts and express them and resolve them.

So we worked on this inner conflict with EFT, and as usual, it turns out to have roots in his early childhood. We went deep into a trance state through tapping, and I'm hopeful he'll feel at least a partial shift in this area from here on out.

In the meantime, I told him not to bother making any promises to me, because I wouldn't believe a word he says ;-)

Ironically, my decision not to accept any promises from him has brought me even more into the present moment. ("I have no idea what will happen tomorrow, but right now this feels like exactly what we're meant to be doing for both of our healing. Let's not interfere with the present moment by doing any future planning."). Geez, I sound like a PUA. Lol :-p

I don't suggest radical honesty as something we do "for" other people. It's something we do for ourselves. It brings us into a degree of congruence that most people cannot even imagine. And congruence brings peace of mind, happiness, and effortless accomplishment.

To hear more about my teachings on congruence, please check out my free video footage from the 21 Convention.

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To sign up for coaching with me, go to this page.

Here's my latest testimonial:

Working with Erika was great! She was very intuitive and helped me key in on issues that have been holding me back and frustrating me for a long time. She also helped me figure out the origins of these issues and work through them. Erika could sense how I was feeling often before I realized it myself and she helped me move my attention to where it was needed. Working with her gave me a foundation in EFT that I have been using over the last few days with great results and am excited to keep exploring with down the road. Thanks Erika

To be alerted about special members-only discounts on coaching, products, and events, please go here and sign up for my newsletter. You will also receive advance notification and a members-only discount when my e-book is released, most likely in early October. It's in production right now. So sign up for the newsletter now.

Paradigm Shift About Sex

I'm not exactly sure what happened to me at Burning Man, but ... oh my do I feel different ...

My lower chakras, after having been shut down for years, are all lit up. There is literally heat radiating from them.

Meanwhile, I'm having very sexual thoughts about a number of guys, all of whom I would put in the camp of actual or potential sexual healers, including Burning Man Guy, Entropy, and Hypnotica.

This is really a wild ride.

I put this comment on one of the earlier posts and will repeat the thread here:

First, Deirdre said this:

I agree with everything you said here Erika, and I think women are at a serious disadvantage when negotiating sex/relationship with a new guy if they're looking at trusting him or not. It seems to me that directing our thoughts toward trusting them or not trusting them is irrelevant , because regardless of their level of awareness, we know that they lie to get sex, and we're trying to decide if we can trust them before we even know them. Cliche as it is I'm gonna say - actions speak louder than words - and this is something for women to pay attention to, because in order for a woman to check out a man's actions, she has to give him time to show them to her. Thus, the quickness with which she might have otherwise become intimate with him is obliterated

When we rush into sex we rob men of the opportunity to prove themselves to us, to build something with us. Everyone talks about the importance that men place on sex. I think men also want real relationships with women, but some have been hypnotized by our culture to think that sex is the ultimate goal for them. They want us to let them work to gain our affection because then it has value - and they get to know that we really like them for who they are. And they get to know themselves and trust themselves this way, by doing things to show themselves to us they show themselves to themselves.

There's a problem when women feel connected with a guy soon after meeting him, and he's special and it feels good and you want to open up, but I think we would do better to become a little more disciplined about defining our own boundaries, ones that work for us based on our knowledge of men but more importantly the knowledge of what works for us.

Then Daria said this:

I feel comfortable having sex with some guys without feeling worried that they will hurt me or what not.

I just do what I want and trust myself that if I want it it's good for me.

I feel like they will continue to work for my affection even after I have sex. If they don't then, they don't before or after, but sex is my gift to me. And I want it when it feels good, emotional stuff, trust and all that factoring into how much I want it.

Then Deirdre responded:

Very interesting Daria. I suppose we are each wired a little differently. I'm definitely curious about how some women can engage in casual sex without the repercussions so many of us face .

It's something I often ponder about myself - why doing something that feels so right at the time, down the road looks like a mistake. The last guy I was involved with asked me for an exclusive relationship about a month in, even though we had sex 2 or 3 weeks in. It's not that he won't stay interested after sex, but I think the quality of his interest may not be optimal when HE perceives or feels that he hasn't worked enough for it. Generally, we value what we work for, and this may be truer for men than women.. (?) So when I look back at my inner scenario at the moment I turned that page with him (sex), I remember CLEARLY feeling YES this is the right thing to do now. And all the rules I had previously set for myself - for my own self-care - seemed completely false and unreal in the presence of - how can I say it - my physical/chemical/emotional/spiritual attraction to him.

So I wonder what this is about - if it feels so right, why does it turn out not to be good for me? And i think it has everything to do with me having behaved in a way that is not in alignment with what I want in the bigger picture.

And it was after reading Deirdre's response that I realized what a profound shift I had at Burning Man, so I wrote this:

Deirdre and Daria,

I'm feeling kinda excited right now because after my Burning Man experience I have an intuition that I'll be able to bridge your two perspectives.

Deirdre, I have often had the same concerns that you have and yet part of me has longed for the freedom that Daria expresses in her sexuality.

Now I've got a new perspective on all this. Maybe all the dark feelings stirred up having sex with certain guys were just the unwinding of karma, and not a "mistake" at all ....

Maybe when the intention of sex gets transformed from lifelong commitment to "whatever is most healing for both people right now" we can take a lot of the pressure off, get very present with the feelings that get stirred up, and actually heal each other (both men and women) through extremely conscious sex.

And, as that healing process occurs, then we become more and more likely to end up in the perfect permanent relationship for us.

That's my working theory, I'm pretty excited to explore this, probably with multiple partners.

And, yes, there are a number of you who can now say "Told you so." Lol :-)

After all, this blog is all about AWAKENING.

Let Miracles Replace All Grievances - for Sinn, Savoy, and Entropy :-)

Before we get started today, I've been getting a lot of questions about whether I do intensive one-on-one coaching. The answer is YES. In fact, I'm doing one this weekend, and it simply means you can buy a coaching package (which gives you a discount on multiple sessions) and use them all at once. All my rates are going up on September 13, so please book now. You can book now and use sessions later, but sessions purchased after September 13 are subject to the new rates. Here's the link.

Why do an intensive one-on-one with me? Because it's probably the fastest way around to take a quantum leap forward in your life. It doesn't matter which "method" you're already using, whether it's Rori if you're a woman, or RSD or Hristiyan or AMP or whatever if you're a guy. I will help you vastly accelerate your results, using the magical power of Emotional Freedom Technique.

To see a free introduction to my coaching approach, check out my speech at The 21 Convention by going here. And then go here to sign up for sessions before the rates go up September 13.

Also, my coaching time at the PUA World Summit in Hollywood September 26-27 is rapidly being booked up, but I might be able to work with one more guy, in person or in field, so if you're interested in that please email me at erika.awakening@gmail.com.

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Now I want to talk a bit about the importance of forgiveness for our full happiness.

A Course in Miracles, which is an incredibly powerful book that I highly recommend, talks about this a lot.

Remember the bruise that never happened on my way at Burning Man? This is what I mean by forgiveness.

It's not that someone did something to us and we are now forgiving them for it. It's the recognition that what we thought they did to us NEVER HAPPENED.

Everything we see is nothing more than our own programming, rooted in the past. This is why EFT is so powerful. When we trace our negative experiences back in time to their origin (usually an experience with our parents), and apply EFT to that pattern, we are literally reprogramming the subconscious mind. We are erasing the pattern (or "karma") at its origin, and that pattern will cease to be seen in our world. This is true liberation, and it allows complete forgiveness of our brother.

ACIM puts it this way:

"Pardon is ALWAYS justified, and has a sure foundation. You do not forgive the unforgivable, nor overlook a real attack that calls for punishment. Salvation does not lie in being asked to make unnatural responses, which are inappropriate to what is real. Instead, it merely asks that you respond appropriately to what is not real, by not perceiving what has not occurred. If pardon were unjustified, you would be asked to sacrifice your rights when you return forgiveness for attack. But you are merely asked to see forgiveness as the natural reaction to distress which rests on error, and thus calls for help. Forgiveness is the ONLY sane response. It KEEPS your rights from being lost to you."

ACIM also says Let Miracles Replace All Grievances.

So I take another step in the direction of forgiveness today, with these words:

Sinn, even though you insisted we exchange blogroll links and then took mine off without talking to me about what was going on and it felt really annoying, I love and accept you completely.

Savoy, even though we certainly have not been getting along and I have no idea what's even true anymore (i.e., you may not even have a girlfriend), today I say "whatever," and I love and accept you completely.

Entropy, even though I don't know what the F happened with us, because when I look within I see only love for you and some of the most amazing memories of my life, I love and accept you completely.

And so it goes, with each and every person against whom I have been holding any grievance.

Let me behold my savior in this one You have appointed
as the one for me to ask to lead me to the holy light
in which he stands, that I may join with him.

Let this be the day we declare: "Let miracles replace all grievances."

Erika is about to be Awakened ...

Lol :-)

I can feel it already, and he's not even here yet. Wow, powerful stuff.

Full report tomorrow.

Kisses.

Why Avoiding Conflict Destroys Relationships

Here's a theme I've been noticing the past few days. I trace this pattern back to my dad. It's a bit of programming that I'm ready to let go of, so you can be sure I'll be applying Emotional Freedom Technique to it over the next few days.

Back in May, at Hristiyan's workshop, we talked about the importance of men being able to say a clear "yes" and a clear "no."

This requires CONGRUENCE, which I talked a lot about in my speech at the 21 Convention.

This is a bit of a sore subject for me right now, as I'm realizing a lot of my trust issues with men come from my dad, and he and I are in some intense communications about this right now. I'm applying EFT so that I can "delete" this negative programming from my life, as it is a theme that has interfered with countless relationships, including with Entropy and Burning Man Guy.

How can a woman trust a man who doesn't keep his word?

And how can a man keep his word if he is afraid of conflict?

This is the pattern I see men get into: They want to "please" everyone, and particularly women. So they say "yes" to things that they haven't fully thought through. Maybe in the moment, it feels good to promise to help with a project, or to promise monogamy or a commitment of some kind, but they are not really being honest with themselves or the women in their lives about whether they can keep that promise. Then, when the time comes to follow through on their promises, they don't.

And then, because they feel guilty for not keeping their promises, they produce a slew of excuses and rationalizations.

Is there any faster way to destroy trust than not keeping one's word?

I don't think so.

Oh no, wait a minute, there is one faster way to destroy trust: to pretend after the fact that you didn't make the promise that you both know you made. Wow, ouch. As a woman, when a man does that, it feels a bit like the world is unraveling. It fucking sucks.

We would so much prefer that you don't make the promise in the first place if you're not going to keep it.

Good relationships are founded on trust. Trust comes from honesty and congruence.

This means checking in with ourselves in every moment and being brutally honest with ourselves. Am I making this promise now because I don't want to deal with conflict and am trying to please everyone? Am I making it to get something short term from this woman (such as getting her to have sex with me), but am not going to be able to keep the promise later? Or am I in my full integrity here, knowing what I want and what I'll be able and willing to do?

Clear yes or clear no.

And if for some reason, your yes or no doesn't feel clear, then for God's sakes, share your inner conflict with her.

"Sweetheart, part of me wants to promise you monogamy, but I'm feeling really torn right now because another part of me knows that I don't have a good track record for fidelity. I don't want to make a promise that I might not be able to keep."

Will this create a stir? Possibly. But at least then the inner conflict will be ventilated and possibly resolved.

At least then she won't feel betrayed later. She may not like hearing it, but she can trust a man who knows himself inside and out.

Conversation with Hypnotica

Oh, lots of exciting and fun things on the horizon. Among them,

1. If I have time tonight, I'll write Part 3 of the Burning Man story.

2. It looks like things are shaping up for me to have my own White Tiger Tantra sexual healing session with Steve Piccus. Yay!

3. Burning Man Guy is coming over tomorrow night to continue the sexual healing we began last week.

*****************************

In the meantime, Hypnotica reemerged out of the blue. For those who are not familiar, Hypnotica is one of the original gurus of the seduction community and is otherwise known as "Rasputin" in Neil Strauss' book The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists.

Here's our mostly unedited text conversation:

Hypnotica: You must be getting excited.

Me: To see you [at the PUA Summit September 26-27]?

H: Didn't say that but since up bring it up, thank you.

M: Lol excited for what?

H: Excited that I'm watching you right now.

M: Whatcha mean?

H: Red top. Black skirt. [He's referring to my video from the 21 Convention]

M: Oh lol :)

H: You look pretty sexy up there.

M: Awwww thank you :)

M: I'm going to do the White Tiger Tantra thing, get sexually healed.

H: I'd like to slide that red top right off of you very slowly.

M: Hahaha :-p

M: I got some healings at burning man, released a sexual trauma, now want to turn myself back on.

H: Maybe that's why I texted you. Coming closer back to the good stuff.

M: Maybe.

M: I'm gonna write more about it tonite.

H: You don't close your lower section in handwriting.

H: That's your sexual zone. Interesting.

M: Lower section? Like how?

H: You don't follow through on your g's the loop going down is the sexual area.

M: Usually I loop them ... what does it mean leaving it open?

H: Not fulfilled sexually.

M: Haha :)

M: Soon. I'm about to come in to my full power.

M: More healing tomorrow night.

H: Maybe at the PUA summit.

H: Your energy does feel better.

M: Yeah, and I got mobility in my shoulders and lungs that I don't remember ever having. I feel softer, less urgent.

M: This guy [Burning Man Guy] is going to keep working with me. I'm very excited :)

H: Maybe you'll be ready for me then.

M: Perhaps. Can I put parts of this convo on the blog?

H: Sure. You can tell them you're moving back into becoming pure and since sex energy is the foundation it is only natural that we corresponded today. And how lucky you are to have that chance.

M: :)

**************************

All right, I need to run for now.

Please remember, all my coaching rates are going up September 13, so lock in the low rates now by going here.

Kisses,
Erika

The 21 Convention Videos Have Been Released ...

Hooray! This is very exciting.

To see the video of my speech, which was entitled Spiritual Seduction: Change Your Love Life by Changing Your Belief System,

go HERE.

I would love to get your feedback.

Also, Gone Savage put up a great article on his blog here. I'd be lying if I claimed to always be present enough to follow these principles, but I like them a lot as inspiration.

xoxo,
Erika

New comment policy on the blog - non-violent communication only, please

Hey everyone,

As part of my contribution to the evolving global consciousness, I've decided to change my approach to comment approval around here.

I love your comments. Often your contributions to the discussion help me see things with new eyes, and your participation definitely motivates me to keep writing.

At the same time, I am wanting to create a safe space here for people to share their feelings and experiences without fear of being judged or ridiculed. I really like the atmosphere on Rori's blog in that way.

Thus, I am implementing a "non-violent communication" comment policy. I don't actually care if you use the NVC formula (which is "I feel ________ when I see/hear _____________ because my need for _________ is met/not met"). What matters to me is the consciousness of your comments.

Thus, you are welcome to disagree with me as vehemently as you like. My request is that you take full responsibility for your own emotions and experience, however. It's fine to express anger, frustration, sadness, etc., even if it's triggered by something I wrote. But realize this is YOUR experience and please refrain from attributing responsibility for your experience to me or anyone else.

That way, people can feel free to "riff" here with feeling messages and so forth without fear of being torpedoed by violent communication.

If your comment involves blaming, shaming, diagnosing, judging, analyzing, or criticizing me or anyone else, it will not be published. All of those violent communication practices contribute to separation and conflict between people. They don't feel good to me or others, and I'm no longer willing to tolerate them here. Realize that when we reach for any of those practices, we are really trying to avoid our own uncomfortable feelings by pointing the finger at someone else. An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind, so please communicate responsibly :-)

To learn more about non-violent (compassionate) communication, I encourage you to check out Marshall Rosenberg's official website.

Thanks for your understanding, please keep the comments coming, and if you have any concerns about this policy that you'd like to discuss with me, please email me at erika.awakening@gmail.com.

Rebirth at Burning Man, Part 2: Honesty is the First Step Toward Intimacy

Part 1 of this series is here.

Hmmm ... I'm noticing myself having a bit of resistance about writing this one. This stuff is so powerful, and a lot of emotion is still stirring inside me. But it feels important, so here goes ...

I went to Burning Man with a guy called Burning Man Guy (BMG). This turned out to be very fortuitous. It seems that God had sent me a surrogate healer. Let me explain why I say that.

I was still feeling a lot of unresolved stuff from my relationship with Entropy. Meanwhile, BMG also had a breakup of an emotionally deep relationship, and he was essentially in the mirror opposite situation of me. Whereas I was still feeling some anger with what I perceived as less than full honesty and respect for my vulnerability, BMG had played the other role in his relationship. The woman he was involved with ended their relationship and cut off communication with him because she had perceived him as being less than fully honest.

In the days leading up to Burning Man, I was finding that my unresolved anger was extremely triggered in my communications with BMG. I decided to be as radically honest with him as I possibly could, and to BMG's credit, he was able to hold all of my emotions without collapsing.

Now I will say this, one of the beauties of surrogate healing work is that it's easier to hold all of someone else's emotions when we're not personally involved in the situation. So it was perfect for BMG and I to go to Burning Man together. We were able to express to each other all of the things that we would have liked to express to our partners but were unable to due to how much energy was activated in those relationships. Sometimes when old stuff gets triggered, our emotional responses to it are overwhelming and make it very challenging to maintain connection. Especially when both people in a relationship get triggered and caught up in "old stories." There is a loss of presence and thus a loss of connection.

Thus, the first step in the healing process was honesty.

BMG and I have some chemistry. And I noticed myself feeling angry about this. It seemed to me that he wanted to be sexually involved with me. That triggered dissonance in me because when I look at what I know about his last two relationships, I perceive that he has left a trail of pain behind him. Both of those women were left feeling very angry and upset.

I told BMG I was feeling angry. And I told him that the thought that went with that anger was something of the effect of "Where do you get off thinking I would want to get involved with you when what I perceive is a trail of pain left behind you? Why would I want to subject myself to a replay of that script?"

Now to some that may sound harsh, but BMG and I had established a trust around our honesty beforehand. I took full responsibility for my feelings while also expressing myself without self-censoring.

During our car ride, he said something like "I don't understand why she would throw our whole relationship away." And I said something like, "I feel very angry hearing you say that. It doesn't sound like you are taking responsibility for your part. YOU threw the relationship away, by not being fully honest. When I don't hear you take responsibility for that, I do not feel the trust with you that I would need to have to get involved with you."

And so it went, with both of us expressing honestly our experiences of our previous relationships. With each hour that went by, the anger level dropped. It was quite magical. I felt like I could give him a window into what his ex was feeling when she cut off communication. ("You know, BMG, cutting off communication doesn't mean we don't care about you. It means we don't know how to shift the dynamic that is going on, and the dynamic feels painful, so we cut off communication to get ourselves out of pain, to move on with our lives.")

I felt like I could give him a window into how it feels as a woman when your partner is not fully honest. It feels like your free choice was stolen from you. Like your ability to choose a relationship that feels good to you and say no to a relationship that doesn't was taken away from you.

And meanwhile, I got to hear from him what was motivating him when he was less than honest with her. The guilt and inner conflict. I got to hear how it felt to have communication cut off (pretty crappy) and to lose someone from his life that he cares about so dearly. I got to hear his confusion about monogamy versus polyamory.

I got to see his pain about being caught up in a "story" where he hurts women by exercising his sexuality freely, and he got to see my pain about being caught up in a "story" where men's exercising their sexuality freely ends up hurting me.

I started to feel like I could SEE him, and I started to feel SEEN by him.

Then, as the anger dropped and the empathy and understanding rose, it all started to seem silly. We started laughing about the "stories" of victim and perpetrator that we had allowed ourselves to get caught up in. We started laughing at the absurdity of our mirroring situations (I had unfriended the guy on Facebook, and BMG had been unfriended). We both felt grateful that God had put us together on this trip to heal each other.

**************************

BMG is a powerful healer, but I had no idea how powerful, until this week. Let me tell you how the week started, because this small event was symbolic of what ended up happening later in the week.

BMG and I stayed overnight in Reno at a hotel on Tuesday. In the morning, as we were getting ready to head out to Black Rock City, I smashed my upper thigh on a chair. I was bummed because I tend to bruise easily and heal slowly (well, that's an old identity anyway ;-). I told BMG it sucked because I was going to have a huge bruise all week (which is the last thing a girl wants for wearing skimpy outfits and fishnets). (Notice the "story" I was telling myself, a self-fulfilling prophecy that FEELS true! If I were one of my clients, I would ask "are you ready to let go of this old identity now?" ;-)

BMG immediately started healing me where I had hit my leg on the chair. He channeled universal life energy into the sore spot and tapped some acupressure spots to release the excess energy. To my absolute astonishment, no bruise formed! Not even the slightest mark. It was as if the injury had NEVER HAPPENED.

BMG explained that he was simply interrupting my body's automatic trauma response, and essentially reprogramming my body's reaction to the impact with the chair.

Well, that got me thinking. What happens in relationships when they deteriorate? Usually one or both people's automatic trauma responses get triggered, and then a previously blissful couple may become reactive to each other and disconnected. This is what trauma does ... it disconnects us from the universal life force and from each other.

I had been noticing that I tend to have trauma reactions in relationships sometimes. That certainly happened in my relationship with Entropy.

So what if we could interrupt the trauma response in relationships just as BMG did with my smashed leg? Ah ... then when trauma gets triggered, we would simply get very present with it, we would use it as an opportunity for healing our belief systems .... and people would stay connected. All the tears about the old stories would be replaced by laughter and love.

How BMG helped me to interrupt my trauma response in relationships will be the subject of the next article in this series.

I also gifted about fifteen healings of my own at Burning Man, and I'll write about some of those as well. With every healing given or received, the healer becomes more powerful :-)

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Btw, due to the holiday weekend, and by popular demand, I am extending my current coaching rates for a few days, until next Sunday Sept. 13 at midnight Pacific Time. Book now to lock in the low rates before they are gone.

Rebirth at Burning Man, Part 1: Reclaiming My Sexuality :-)

Oh ... My ... God.

I just got back from Burning Man, and I'm so excited to tell you all about it that I'm blogging before doing ANYTHING else. Haven't showered, haven't unpacked, haven't done diddly squat except get my computer out so I could start sharing with you immediately.

I feel REBORN. I am not joking. I feel like a completely different person. Like 100 pounds of emotional weight was lifted off my body.

Burning Man is different every year. This year was not about partying until dawn, at least not for me. It was about healing and ... apparently ... about beginning to reclaim my sexuality.

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I went to the event with a guy who I'm calling Burning Man Guy (BMG). He and I met exactly one year ago, at Burning Man, very appropriately at the entrance of the Temple of the Divine Feminine in the Sacred Spaces Camp. We had an immediate heart chakra connection and remained friends all year but had not become super close.

This year we again stayed with Sacred Spaces. Our camp was right next to Red Lightning, and this was one of the highest vibrational sites I've ever experienced, at Burning Man or otherwise. The place was filled with healing crystals, sacred geometry, and a large number of powerful healers.

This set the scene for a quite remarkable development in my life. I often tell my Emotional Freedom Technique clients that their outer world will mirror their inner world. Thus, if they have an inner conflict about something, that conflict will show up in the people and places they experience. The Inner Committee will manifest as the Outer Committee.

Well, as you know if you've read this blog for a while, I've had an inner conflict for a long time about sex. Part of me has been very happy with the clarity and spiritual presence that abstinence has brought me. Another part of me has been hopeful all along that I could find a way to integrate sex into my life that would feel good to me. I wanted to find a way to experience sacred sex, which to me is sex that is deeply connected and loving and healing. I got a glimpse of that in January in Los Angeles, when Entropy and I entered into a very sacred sexual space that I personally had never experienced before. In essence, we accidentally discovered tantra, which I had long heard about but never felt for myself.

It was absolutely amazing.

The only trouble is that we connected so deeply that in the aftermath some very painful old stuff was stirred up for me, and I suspect for him, too. And I couldn't seem to get myself fully out of the pain of it ... until now. For me, Burning Man turned out to be about healing the pain through a surrogate. An absolutely fascinating process. But more on that in the next post. :-)

For now, I just have to appreciate God's sense of humor.

How did my inner conflict about sex get played out in my experience? Well, we were camped alongside Krishna Camp, a group of ... as the name suggests ... devout Krishnas. Most of them celibate men. But we were also camped with the S.E.X. camp, which is all about sacred sexuality and creates a safe space for people to experience that. And it turned out there was a bit of a flare-up between the two groups prior to Burning Man, giving rise to much tension, which led the leaders of the camp to put together a panel to discuss the issue openly of whether it was a good idea to have sacred sex people in the same camp with sacred celibacy people.

The panel included a celibate monk from the Krishnas, my friend Destin Gerek (http://www.eroticrockstar.com), a soccer mom turned gay/bisexual activist, a gay foot fetishist healer, Dancer (the male partner from S.E.X.), and Sherri Huggi Ma, among others.

They all talked about their experiences, and you know what? Despite the wide variety of practices, we heard a lot of common ground. It seemed like everyone is really just looking for a better connection to the Divine. After listening to all this, I started feeling that my abstinence had been a great way to get clarity about sex and develop a very stable center, but that I really did want to explore the sacred sexuality stuff. Fortunately, I have a lot of friends who teach sacred sex, so I'm going to have a lot of resources.

(And, btw, lest anyone should doubt the power of celibacy, I noticed being very sexually activated around the Krishnas, which is rare for me. I attribute it to the fact that they have cultivated a ton of presence and clear minds, so their masculinity comes off as very pure and powerful. Also, they are not trying to get something from women, and the vibe felt like a deep respect for women. I hope they won't be offended by me saying that. ;-)

I'll save the rest of the stories for the next few blog posts, but here's a little teaser. BMG is a very powerful healer, but I had no idea how powerful until this week. He gave me three unbelievably powerful healings three days in a row, and I feel like an entirely different person. We released some old trauma, which is what got stirred up after January (had nothing to do with the present moment, all trapped in my body from the past).

And I have set a new intention: I now intend to reclaim my root and sacral chakras (and with them my sacred sexuality), just as I've already reclaimed my heart chakra and my intuition.

This is going to be a VERY exciting journey, so hold on for the ride! :-)

Big big big smiles today.

Love,
Erika

So many exciting things on the horizon ...

Hey everyone,

All right, this may be my last post before Burning Man, so I wanted to give a quick summary of all the really exciting events and developments on the horizon.

1. Emotional Freedom Technique at Burning Man

I am teaching a two-hour free EFT workshop at Burning Man, at the Evolutionary Temple, from 6 to 8 pm on Friday, September 4. I will cover EFT for dating & relationships and EFT for abundance, so please come by if you'll be at Burning Man. Evolutionary Temple is located at Esplanade and 5:00. I also intend to give free personal sessions at Center Camp from Wednesday through Sunday.

2. The PUA World Summit, September 26 to 27, Hollywood, CA

The PUA Summit is coming up fast. Today is the last day to purchase $229 tickets by going HERE. If you wait until after midnight tonight, tickets will go up $40 to $269. So now is the time to get your ticket if you haven’t already.

I will be speaking on a Panel on Saturday evening (September 26) with other seduction community luminaries like Marni Wing and Adonis. Please join us.

Although my time in LA is filling up quickly, I do have one or two more slots available for guys who would like to do private EFT sessions or in-field EFT coaching while I’m in Los Angeles. Please email me at erika.awakening@gmail.com to check availability and sign up.

EFT-powered coaching will dissolve sticking points and accelerate your results in field more than you can imagine. See testimonials here.

3. Erika’s Upcoming e-Book, Due to Be Released in September or Early October

I’m happy to announce that my long-awaited e-Book about Spiritual Seduction is now in its initial stages of production. This e-Book will provide a much-needed roadmap for using spiritual methods to improve your love life. It will be chock full of reality-shifting concepts and powerful and practical tips and techniques.

Members of my newsletter list will receive advance notification and a discount on the e-Book, so please sign up for my list now.

4. Erika’s Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) Monthly Video Club

There is a shortage of high quality videos on the market teaching people how to use EFT to improve their love lives. I will be starting a members-only video subscription service to address this need.

Members of my newsletter list will receive advance notification and discounts on video products, so please sign up for my list HERE.

5. Video Footage from The 21 Convention Due to Be Released on September 8

I’m very excited that the video footage from the Convention is due to be released next Tuesday. After seeing a preview of my footage this week, I’m very pleased. The speech gives an easy-to-follow introduction to my coaching philosophy. I’ll be posting the video here on September 8, so please check back then.

Meanwhile, it’s time to start thinking about The 21 Convention for 2010. This is seriously one of the best events in the entire community, and it gets better every year. Discounted early bird tickets are available for purchase HERE. If you use the discount code “erikarocks,” you will receive an additional $10 discount and you’ll also be helping to support this blog. It's win/win, just the way I like it :-)

6. Coaching Rates Going Up on September 8, So Sign Up Now

My current coaching rates are ridiculously low for an EFT practitioner with my training and experience. The rates will be going up across the board on September 8. The only way to lock in the current low rates is to purchase coaching packages before September 8 by going here and signing up through the PayPal button. If you purchase coaching packages by September 7, you can use those sessions in the future. But all sessions purchased on September 8 or later are subject to the new rates. So sign up now and save lots of money.

To read testimonials about my clients' great results, go here.

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That’s it for now. I’m sure I’ll have a lot of exciting stories to share with you after Burning Man. Wishing you Godspeed and a happy, fun-filled week.